5 Signs That You’re Actually An Extravert

Classically, the difference between extraversion and introversion is framed in terms of how one recharges their energy. An extravert is supposed to recharge around people, while and introvert is supposed to recharge alone. While I’m not completely dismissing that concept, it isn’t really the root of what makes someone an extravert or an introvert.

What is an Extravert?

Let’s think about this in terms of the cognitive functions. Someone with a dominant extraverted function will find use of that function more natural, ergo easier and less draining. Inversely, someone with a dominant introverted function will find use of that function to be easier and less draining. So, when someone isn’t being forced to use weaker functions, they will “recharge.” However, an extravert will not always make people the focus of their extraverted function. An extravert may not actually like people at all. Not all misanthropes are introverted, and one doesn’t “become” an introvert once humanity burns them. Extraverts can hate people too, just like they can enjoy alone time. I think people tend to assume that extraverts will always hate alone time, but in reality, someone who never introspects is extremely unhealthy, extraverted or not. Healthy extraverts will find a balance. Similarly, extraverts can have social anxiety. They are not always highly socially confident people. There are a variety of factors that come into play here, like physical health, mental health, and life experiences. When it comes right down to it, interacting effectively with people is a SKILL (‘people skills’ is a phrase, yes?), and as I explained in Cognitive Functions Do NOT Determine Skills, a skill is not inborn. You have to practice.

So, in reality, the key to spotting an extravert is determining if they are more often interacting with the external world or more often retreating to their internal world. It’s a matter of what function they’re placing the greatest priority on. If you can figure out your function stack, your best bet is to determine which of the top two functions you yield to the most. Which function more often takes priority?

Of course, we all know what the classic, socially confident extravert looks like. In this article, however, I’m going to go through some signs that Ryan and I have noticed. Some may be obvious, and some may be less obvious. Also keep in mind, that some of the behavior, depending on extremity, will more likely be found in a younger or immature extravert.

5 Potential Signs of Extraversion

1. Frequent impulsive behavior

Impulse is usually attributed to Se, and that’s not incorrect. However, that attribution needs to be broadened. Anyone leading with an extraverted function will be prone to acting before thinking, because their dominant or default function is aimed at the external world. Now, the type of impulse here may vary between the types. But, on average, an introvert will tend to hesitate prior to acting or be prone to overthinking since they will prioritize internal analysis, while an extravert will want to just launch into action. Don’t take this to an extreme though. I’m not saying that an introvert will never act impulsively, and an extravert will never stop to think. (Maturity is a thing that all types can achieve.) Look at overall preferences and patterns. If given a choice, an extravert will WANT to just launch into action and do the thing, while an introvert will WANT to stop and think. An extravert will WANT to act on their extraverted function.

Bear in mind, Te dominant impulsive behavior is going to be far different than, for instance, Se dominant impulsive behavior. The Ne dominants and Se dominants will give more of the impression of chaos or “figuring it out as they go” since they’re launching into action with a perceiving function rather than a judging function. A Te dominant will probably seem the most controlled or purposeful when they’re being “impulsive”, followed closely by the Fe dominants.

2. Easily interacting with others and/or complete strangers

Talking is another way one interacts with the external world. Someone who does not really struggle to talk to others may be extraverted. Although, once again, don’t take this to an extreme. Introverts can learn how to communicate easily and effectively. However, if you’re the type who has never really had any kind of issues talking with others and tends to strike up conversations where ever you go, you are probably an extravert. (That’s not to say that you never struggle to find words or that you’re even likeable, but rather the physical act of going and talking to someone has never bothered you.)

3. An inability to shut up or frequently saying something you regret

Taking point 2 one step farther, an inability to shut up is a dead giveaway that someone is an extravert. If someone gets around people, starts dominating all of the conversations and generally just doesn’t stop talking, they’re an extravert. In addition, someone who is constantly putting their foot in their mouth or complaining about an inability to keep a thought or opinion to themselves is also probably an extravert. Granted, as an ISTP (or aux Se), sometimes a sarcastic comeback or sharp statement will just shoot out of my mouth before I have a chance to think. Realistically speaking, this happens to everyone. However, as a whole, the words I say are more intentional, and I get frustrated with myself more often for failing to say something than for failing to keep my mouth shut. If you are more often getting angry at yourself for failing to keep your mouth shut, you may be an extravert. (Keep context in mind though – an introvert can definitely word vomit in intimate settings, around close friends or family. Make sure you look at the whole picture versus one scenario.)

4. Can’t sit still

This ties into point 1 somewhat. A extravert will by default want to utilize their extraverted dominant function. If as a mature adult, you have a tendency to be constantly on the go or you struggle to relax and do “nothing”, you may be extraverted. I’m going to take a second here to hone in specifically on the Te dominants, because I’ve noticed that they have a tendency to think that they’re introverted, because Te users aren’t always interested in people. (Te seems to be the least social out of all the extraverted functions.) However, if as an IXTJ, you find yourself incapable of sitting still, and you are constantly, actively working toward finishing something, you may want to reconsider the position of your Te function. Te, in a sense, is similar to Se because both are interested in concrete results; Te just takes it one step farther and wants to reach the end goal NOW, because they find less enjoyment in the process. Both functions are action oriented. Te dominants may struggle to sit still and relax, because they have goals that they want to complete.

5. Preferring the presence of others even though not actively engaged

A social extravert doesn’t need to constantly interact with people in order to feel fulfilled. Sometimes, an extravert will simply be satisfied by the presence of people, even when said extravert doesn’t appear to really be involved. Perhaps they’re just sitting their contentedly, watching and listening to others. Sometimes we’re quick to call people introverted simply because they are mellow, but that is not always the case. Someone who overall enjoys the presence of others more so than being alone, regardless of how engaged they appear, is probably extraverted. (Once again, context and seeing the overall pattern is key. An introvert may not find the presence of, for instance, a significant other to be draining, and may desire to have that person present constantly.)

In conclusion…

Is there anything I’ve missed? Are there any other signs that you look for? Let me know, and as usual, feel free to ask questions. But as a final note on this article, don’t forget: An extravert isn’t necessarily going to display all of the tendencies listed above. However, a self-proclaimed introvert who finds themselves displaying the some of these signs may want to double-check which cognitive function is actually at the top of their stack.